I finally went to a class at Yoga Tree, today. Yoga Tree is partnered with Shanti Yoga Studio in McCall - the only yoga teacher training offered in Idaho ...and the place I hope to enroll in by next year. The Wednesday class with Debbi Murphy (the owner of the Shanti) was recommended to me by a fellow yoga student during a class at the Muse studio. (confused by all the studio names yet??) I didn't know that it would be this fellow student, not the class, that would so positively impact me.
So, I drove to class feeling really down. I decided not to go to Portland this weekend for Labor Day. It's time to be responsible, and I realized that without a job/financial security, taking a vacation isn't very smart. I had been looking forward to the trip all summer to visit one of my best friends, Jesse. It was disappointing to cancel our visit. That mixed with the disheartening job-hunt process left me feeling vulnerable and teary-eyed. I hoped yoga class would be my therapy.
(With Jesse at E-Ball 2009)I arrived at yoga class ready to leave all my emotions on the mat, settle into the moment and gain appreciation for the life we all have. But, the class didn't go as I envisioned. Debbi is at Burning Man, so we had a substitute. For me, yoga is called a practice for a reason. I go to a class to practice yoga, not to perfect it. This class was all about precision, though....more workshop format. The flowing sequences and warm energy I cherish and knew I needed weren't there. After about 10 minutes of sharp instruction, I had about had it.Then, someone walked in that I recognized from Muse - it was the person who had recommended the class. After a few minutes she decided to leave. I scrambled out the door asking her if this was how class always was. She assured me it wasn't. I decided to jump ship, too. I left feeling my eyes well up with tears - my emotions have been so on the surface lately.
Luckily and fatefully, my fellow Muse was waiting for me at the top of the stairs. The tears finally won, and I started to cry. She hugged me. In retrospect, it should have felt awkward, but it didn't at all.
We sat outside and talked, and it brought the comforting and welcoming feeling that I had hoped to find in the yoga class. She sympathized with me about what a hard time this is to be looking for a job and told me about her two daughters. One graduated college and was lucky - she landed a great job right off the bat. Her other daughter had majored in some humanity/social science and, like me, realized the expensive degree didn't qualify her for a career beyond waiting tables. (we'll see if I can do that - I applied at Applebee's today, and I really hope I get the job!). So, she went back to college to major in education, became a teacher and loved her job. Then, the education cut-backs came, and she was laid off. Now she babysits.
(reminds me of the Nanny Diaries, but this real-life story is more bitter)
My new friend told me how she remembers this daughter crying to her that even coffee shops wouldn't hire her. I'm feeling the same sense of helplessness. Yesterday, I applied at Old Navy and just 3 hours later, I received a rejection email saying I was not chosen for the job...just 3 hours later! Maybe this story about her daughter should be discouraging, but somehow it's comforting to know that many people go through this. And, I will probably go through this several times again in life. My dad today said, "Heck, I'm over 50 and I'm still figuring out what I want to do when I grow up." My new friend told me that she went back to college at age 47 and got her physical therapy assisting degree, and she loves it. Her job integrates her yoga and pilates background with medicine. She talked to me about options of getting a more technical degree, something I've been thinking about for a couple months. Then we talked a little about yoga, about the humor of life, about growing.
It was perfect - just the pick-me-up I needed. Now, I'm feeling more hopeful and motivated. I appreciated her so much and am grateful for the kindness she gave to a stranger. What a beautiful life lesson. Life is good.....even if I do have to go back to school. ha.
(practice random acts of kindness)
Luckily and fatefully, my fellow Muse was waiting for me at the top of the stairs. The tears finally won, and I started to cry. She hugged me. In retrospect, it should have felt awkward, but it didn't at all.
We sat outside and talked, and it brought the comforting and welcoming feeling that I had hoped to find in the yoga class. She sympathized with me about what a hard time this is to be looking for a job and told me about her two daughters. One graduated college and was lucky - she landed a great job right off the bat. Her other daughter had majored in some humanity/social science and, like me, realized the expensive degree didn't qualify her for a career beyond waiting tables. (we'll see if I can do that - I applied at Applebee's today, and I really hope I get the job!). So, she went back to college to major in education, became a teacher and loved her job. Then, the education cut-backs came, and she was laid off. Now she babysits.
(reminds me of the Nanny Diaries, but this real-life story is more bitter)My new friend told me how she remembers this daughter crying to her that even coffee shops wouldn't hire her. I'm feeling the same sense of helplessness. Yesterday, I applied at Old Navy and just 3 hours later, I received a rejection email saying I was not chosen for the job...just 3 hours later! Maybe this story about her daughter should be discouraging, but somehow it's comforting to know that many people go through this. And, I will probably go through this several times again in life. My dad today said, "Heck, I'm over 50 and I'm still figuring out what I want to do when I grow up." My new friend told me that she went back to college at age 47 and got her physical therapy assisting degree, and she loves it. Her job integrates her yoga and pilates background with medicine. She talked to me about options of getting a more technical degree, something I've been thinking about for a couple months. Then we talked a little about yoga, about the humor of life, about growing.
It was perfect - just the pick-me-up I needed. Now, I'm feeling more hopeful and motivated. I appreciated her so much and am grateful for the kindness she gave to a stranger. What a beautiful life lesson. Life is good.....even if I do have to go back to school. ha.
(practice random acts of kindness)
i loved this post!! you write so well that i can follow your emotions throughout the post like frustration, then sadness, but then hopeful. so many of my friends and even my sister are going through this same dreadful process! it's sad really. even i question my career sometimes because i don't enjoy it as much as i feel like i should. but i feel that the economy has backed me into a corner and i just have to take what i can get, and then hopefully our passions in career-form will unfold down the road. keep hanging in there!
ReplyDeleteThanks Chantel! You're right - I think it may take time before we have our dream careers. So, you don't have to just take what you can get....at least not forever. I think it's best to just work any good job for awhile. That way, when we are ready, we will have the financial stability to pursue things that we really love. We just have to always remember that so we don't fall into and get trapped in a job that doesn't fulfill us. :)
ReplyDeleteBut, then again, sometimes I wonder if that logic is too practical...if it is better to take a complete risk and start a crazy venture. But, my next post will kind of be about that.
A beautiful story of movement
ReplyDeleteI tend to forget that all it takes to turn something around is to open up to opportunity, and not just physically, but emotionally as well.